Off Topic Messages

Re: Joke Of The Day

Sat May 31, 2014 11:08 am

Did I read that sign right?

"TOILET OUT OF ORDER. PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW"


In an office:

WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY PLEASE BRING IT BACK OR FURTHER STEPS WILL BE TAKEN


In an office:

AFTER TEA BREAK STAFF SHOULD EMPTY THE TEAPOT AND STAND UPSIDE DOWN ON THE DRAINING BOARD


Outside a second-hand shop:

WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING - BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES, ETC. WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN?


Spotted in a safari park:

ELEPHANTS, PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR


On a repair shop door:

WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR - THE BELL DOESN'T WORK)


Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Daughter

This one I caught in the SGV Tribune the other day and called the Editorial Room and asked who wrote this. It took two or three readings before the editor realized that what he was reading was impossible!!! They put in a correction the next day.


Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers

Now that's taking things a bit far!


Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over

What a guy!


Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant

See if that works any better than a fair trial!


Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges

You mean there's something stronger than duct tape?


Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge

He probably IS the battery charge!


Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft

That's what he gets for eating those beans!


Kids Make Nutritious Snacks

Do they taste like chicken?


Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors

Boy, are they tall!


And the winner is....

Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead



:smt003 :smt003 :smt003

Re: Joke Of The Day

Sat May 31, 2014 3:32 pm

Mountain Misst wrote:Did I read that sign right?

"TOILET OUT OF ORDER. PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW"


In an office:

WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY PLEASE BRING IT BACK OR FURTHER STEPS WILL BE TAKEN


In an office:

AFTER TEA BREAK STAFF SHOULD EMPTY THE TEAPOT AND STAND UPSIDE DOWN ON THE DRAINING BOARD


Outside a second-hand shop:

WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING - BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES, ETC. WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN?


Spotted in a safari park:

ELEPHANTS, PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR


On a repair shop door:

WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR - THE BELL DOESN'T WORK)


Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Daughter

This one I caught in the SGV Tribune the other day and called the Editorial Room and asked who wrote this. It took two or three readings before the editor realized that what he was reading was impossible!!! They put in a correction the next day.


Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers

Now that's taking things a bit far!


Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over

What a guy!


Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant

See if that works any better than a fair trial!


Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges

You mean there's something stronger than duct tape?


Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge

He probably IS the battery charge!


Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft

That's what he gets for eating those beans!


Kids Make Nutritious Snacks

Do they taste like chicken?


Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors

Boy, are they tall!


And the winner is....

Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead



:smt003 :smt003 :smt003



:smt003 :smt003 :smt003 :smt005 :smt005 :smt005 smt192 smt192 smt192 smt174 smt174 smt174

Re: Joke Of The Day

Sun Jun 01, 2014 2:55 am

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:smt003 :smt003 :smt003 :smt005 :smt005 :smt005 smt192 smt192 smt192 smt174 smt174 smt174[/quote]



I'm terrible, I really like slack jokes, lol :smt003 :smt003 :smt003